Paradox...uff dah!

It has been awhile since I have posted anything on this blog. I have been journeying through one of the hardest times of my life. And what has made this time so difficult for me is the presence of paradox in the situation I am facing.

Paradox is defined: "a statement or proposition that seems self-contradictory or absurd but in the reality expresses a possible truth. Any person, thing, or situation exhibiting an apparently contradictary nature." (Dictionary.com)

I think paradox is a constant presence in life. As humans, we are faced with countless situations where the reality of life does not line up with the natural perspectives we want so desperately to hold regarding our lives. Our perspectives, informed by our nature, our upbringing, our context/culture, our faith development, our family systems, and our own desire to have a solid sense of homeostasis in our lives, serve as our stronghold for feeling like we have some grasp on our own identity and how we see ourselves "fitting" in this world. The progression of thought through the Modern and Post-Modern Eras, informed by the time of Enlightenment, has not always served us well when dealing with paradox. The thinking that came out of the eras that proceeded our existence has placed an exclusive value on the importance of empiricism. Empiricism, for lack of a better way to describe it, basically states that the things we perceive create our reality. Descartes is famous to the saying, "I think therefore I am." However, what happens when the things we perceive do not fit nicely in the matrix of understanding that this way of thinking creates? What happens when we sit in the midst of a confusion that our human logic and understanding cannot adequately resolve the conflicts we face? It is this phenomenon that we must work through if we hope to continue in life without a severe feeling of discomfort that cannot be dismissed by just saying "I have no clue." There are times where giving up our logical and cognitive understanding cannot progress us through our troubles.

Walk with me through this situation. There is currently a criminal trial going on in Florida that stirs strong emotion in anyone who is following it. Casey Anthony is a young woman who is accused of killing her two year old daughter. During the proceedings of this trial, the prosecuting counsel called Casey's mother to the stand to witness to the character, activities, and mindset of her own daughter. After an emotional testimony, Cindy Anthony walked off the stand and mouthed the words "I love you" to the daughter who is being accused of one of the worst sins/crimes a human could ever commit. And even in the midst of the mass of evidence against her daughter, Cindy Anthony found strength in herself to remind her daughter of the core feeling that she feels for her kin. Any mother or father can relate to this paradox. While being held accountable to the truth that Cindy Anthony knows about her daughter, she still holds another truth in equal importance. As a mother, no matter how far her daughter has strayed in life, Cindy Anthony still loves her daughter like no one else on this planet. However, when mouthing the words "I love you," to Casey, the response of the daughter towards her mother articulated a whole other emotion. Betrayal. While the psychological condition of both the mother and daughter can be reasonably called into question, there exists two conflicting and contradicting realities. Casey Anthony very well may be guilty for murdering her daughter, however, Cindy Anthony still loves her daughter in the midst of all the accusations.

So where do we go when we are faced with a situation that does not logically resolve itself with the presence of the truth we understand? The human race is faced with a paradox that surrounds us at every turn. There is enough food in this world to feed all people, however we still have children, and people in this world who go without the necessary nutrition to sustain life. There are governments and systems that continue to exploit some people in the world, while providing the basic humans rights for another group of people. We cannot get away from this paradox.

Journeying through this paradox is a painful experience. We must move beyond the conclusions that serve as a source of comfort for our own understanding to reach a place where we can begin to understand our own existence. I believe that in order for us to reach this place, we must bow to an understanding/wisdom that can hold these paradoxes in understanding. I am currently enrolled in a class that is taught by a teacher from Ghana. This professor, in his unique and natural understanding of life, has urged my class to move beyond the "box" that we create in order to understand the world, and to try to hold a perspective that lays outside of our logical understanding. And while I am not a fan of denying our own conscious or understanding, I do believe that in a place of paradox, we must know that our logical, natural understandings do indeed lead us to a place where we must reflect and deal with the conclusion that we do not have the ability to hold the contradicting elements of life, at times, within our own understanding.

There is something bigger than us out there, that governs, sustains, and can adequately deal with the contradictions of the human condition. This is a phenomenon in life where our release of cognitive mastery over life is a necessity in order for us to move forward. We must trust in the fact that God can hold the conflicts and contradictions in the upright and correct understanding. God can in fact redeem the nonredeemable. God can operate outside of the lines and laws of our existence. He can indeed hold all people and situations, regardless of the conflict their existence creates, in His Love.

Faith is the belief in things unseen. Sometimes the resolution we crave dwells in the place we cannot see. When we defer to God's wisdom, we are not weak. In my opinion, when we bow to God's wisdom, we are operating the true sense of obedience. There is strength in that.